Why easy is so hard. The ancestral story.

We projectors are build for ease but haunted, driven by guilt!

Everything started with the question: “What was the main emotion of your father around money?” It was strain, everything related to money and work was always straining. “You can’t always do what you want.” – What they mean: “You can never do what you want.” “You will never find a work that makes you happy.”


 Such sayings come to mind with the afterthought “That they mean well.”, but they don’t. They mean me no harm either, it is just an ancestral thing. Opposite is the life I long for. I want a life of ease and flow, in the rhythm of nature. Even when such a thing can never be a goal, rather a state of consciousness, a way of living.

A week later, a projector popped in my life for an inspiration. Could I even imagine a life of ease and flow? I could, BUT I couldn’t imagine the way there as easy. I had the inherent belief that I need to control the way it was done to get the desired outcome. Even the things I loved became stressful and somehow forced. That was the moment I started to rebel against them.

Then I started with ancestral work, and soon they showed me that my whole lineage could never express themselves and guilt covered by anger was running through them all. It was guilt for the things I did, but more so those I was incapable of doing. The inability to grab an opportunity that might have changed my life. This guilt motivated, drove me to do more and better, and at the same time kept me in the cage.

I rather would be inspired than motivated. A life that is difficult to put into words. There is no goal, no way, they are one and the same. A life of trust, that the universe is benevolent, that most forces out there and in myself are loving. A life where play, ease, lightheartedness leads to the manifestation of all I could ever have dreamed of and everything I need to sustain my physical body.

Ease feels like total relaxation, drifting, anticipation, trust and playfulness. It is not touchable and has no desire to be explained or justified. It’s like lying down in a glade on a summer’s day with a sigh. Like hopping after a butterfly. Like the cool breeze on a hot day. Like the kiss on the cheek of a beloved, without intention.

But this is a life that can’t be planned, that has no goal, no destiny other than itself. Where everything is what it is and thriving happens as a side effect. A life that has no need for explanation and long words such as these. It is far from the shores where we anchor, yet it grows under our bare feet at all times. We just have to let ourselves fall.

I appreciate your time! Thank you for being here.

Join our Mailing List

We will never spam you! You can unsubscribe at any time by clicking the link in the footer of our emails. For information about our privacy practices, please visit Mailchimp and Privacy Policy.

Scroll to top